Wednesday, 14 January 2015

Self-confidence isn't from a twitter feed.

Bonjour Lovelies, 

 (one of my resolutions was to learn French...finally) I hope your first few weeks of 2015 have been AMAZING! If not, you still have 50 weeks to make up for it :)

My first few couple of weeks have had some down moments, paired with some disappointments, but ainsi soit-i! Life is wonderful, and the down days only make the good days all the brighter!!


  I've been having a down couple of days, the kind of days that your significant other's mere sight makes you want to scream and shout for no good reason. This isn't hormonal, it's just been a bit shit.
Pair that with a fair few people unfollowing me on social media and suddenly I started questioning everything I am and what my purpose is. How droll...
I wondered if I should shut down my newly formed blog, deactivate my twitter and instagram and just give up - because without a marching band of followers, who am I?

I am the same person I was when they were following - I am me.

I realised that I've been placing such self-worth on how the online world perceives me, that I completely lost sight of my passion, of my purpose and of my own person. It's crazy to think that our lives are now guided and ruled by these odd, new methods of interaction. 
No matter what you do on social media, blogging, business or just plain social - YOU ARE A BRAND. You are are how you present yourself online, or at least, you are while you're online.

Everything you post, every comment you make, every selfie you take (...I'll be watching you) you are presenting yourself to the masses as a certain kind of person. 
Let's take the fitness junkie: They post motivation quotes on their instagram, blog about their workouts and facebook their gym outfit. They are trying to put themselves out there as a gym-fiend, a healthy, put together person. However, they don't post the times they sleep in all day, the extra serving of icecream on the couch or the workout failures they have; that just wouldn't help the "brand.
However, no matter what they post - the wins, the failures - they are still the same.

How you present yourself online does not make you a better or worse person.

 Let's talk about lady-blogger, the one with 10,000 followers on twitter, the constant posts about her amazing life and the instagram photos of her latest "sponsored" brand. She is the epitome of chic and glam. Is she though? Is she posting the times she wakes up with a zit the size of china on her chin, is she tweeting the times she checks what pair of underwear is clean by the sniff-test (don't lie, we ALL do it) and is she instagramming the fashion failures whilst purchasing milk? No, that would hinder the brand.

So Kelsie, what are you getting at with all this mumbo-jumbo.
Well (and good word by the way!) I am getting at the fact of, no one is who they seem online. That is PERFECTLY fine! That doesn't make them necessarily a good person and it sure as heck doesn't make them a bad person (unless you're an internet troll, in which case go back under your bridge!) they are simply playing a game of social-media poker with a stellar hand and a seriously envious poker-face! The amount of likes on their twitter feed does not determine their self-worth and neither does it determine yours.

In life you're going to have those really people you just cannot stand, for no good reason and for no fault of their own - they are just not the sugar in your tea. Which is absolutely fine! You don't need to like everyone, but please be kind regardless. You're going to have those people that no longer serve a role in your life, the ones who's lessons have been taught and you go your separate ways - this again, is perfectly fine! You don't need to have every single person you meet in your life for the whole time. This is a part of life - this is living and this growing up!

So why should social media be any different? Are you being authentic? or are you like Mr. Fitness-fiend or Ms. Blogger? Are you only posting what you think people want to see? If so, why? Ask yourself - why am I determining my freedom of expression on the opinions of others?
Do you like knitting, whilst also being a goddamn awesome skier? Post about it!
Are you enthralled by Game of Thrones, but also secretly love Downton Abbey? Post about it!
Your feed, your interactions, your life (if you choose to) should never be not documented in fear of the opinions of others! You are not what people think of you.

“People will love you. People will hate you. And none of it will have anything to do with you.”

- Abraham Hicks. 

You are no better than the person with 12 followers and you are no worse than the person with 12,000. Live your truth, some people will love you - some people will hate you. Love those who love you, and respect those that don't; but do not for one second ever live anything but your truth. Do not hide your beauty behind the fear of other, because who are they really? A person you met at a music festival 2 years ago? A girl you went to school with? The weird aunt who always calls you by the wrong name? Because those that matter don't mind, and those that mind do not matter.

Live your goddamn truth bitches!!
Till next time KG xx

Come play with me on instagram and twitter here.
(but if you don't, I don't mind ;P )


Friday, 2 January 2015

Living with a male: Things Disney never told you.

Happy 2015 my lovelies!

How has the past couple of days treated you?! I hope you're well and truly starting on a positive note, and you're kicking ass!

My new year so far has been pretty chilled, MD and I held a impromptu new-years party and all our friends came over to have a beer bong off our balcony...or two. (We'll discuss that and my reaction another time!) Clean up wasn't as bad as I was expecting, our friends were boozy, but not inconsiderate - which is definitely what you are needing in boozy friends!

Today I want to talk about living together, the trials and tribulations of moving in together for the first time and how it's not exactly the fairytale Disney is wanting you to believe it is! 

Don't they look super happy and content?! I doubt they live together!

This is not going to be a man-bashing blog post, oh no siree! I love my MD and I'm sure you love all your "living permanently male housemates" but with all their charms and their wonderful quirks come a lot of "I wish I'd seen this before we signed the lease" oddities. We'll discuss these and my attempts to kind of learn to love them.

Firstly, the moving in was hard - we live in a 2 bed 2 1/2 bath flat on the top floor. There is no lift...
That's right, our apartment and the ones below us are 2 stories high...we had to lug all our furniture up about 7 flights of stairs to our door about 4000 times... This was a trial. There was screaming, shouting and the occasional, "I'll live here alone while you go somewhere else and pay rent still!" argument.. I was always the winner, but ultimately the loser, because it never come to fruition! 

We had a LOT of help, which was AMAZING. Without that help I think we would have been on the 7pm news by now: "COUPLE DIE MOVING HOUSE BY PASSIVE-AGGRESSIVELY HITTING EACH OTHER WITH BOXES UP THE STAIRS!!...More at 7:30." I joke, but this would have happened... We were getting on each others nerves, and massively so. I couldn't do anything right and neither could he. It got to the point where he stayed in his old place for a couple of days in the beginning, whilst I lived in the new apartment for that time. It was bliss, I almost never wanted him to come back! However he did, and now it's a learning curve...

Cleaning and cleanliness is a major factor/argument in our household. I want things a particular way, and he wants them another - AKA, where ever it fits - it goes. I am no Martha Stewart, I am happy to admit, I leave the clean dishes in the dishwasher for a day or two until I get frustrated I can't fill it back up again with my dirty dishes. However, I am rather neat and I don't like clutter or food scraps/ crumbs in the house all over the friggen place!! MD is okay with leaving his dinner mess over night so it can be done in the morning - to me this is a BIG NO-NO!! Why would you do that?! What are we - savages?! Ugh... this is still a constant arguments and as a EGALITARIAN - I am all for equality within the genders and I am happy for him to have equality within the dishwasher realm.

She's pretending to jump in the lake so he'll dive in and finally have a bath!

Laundry is the next thing. I am the first to admit that my side of the wardrobe is a bit haphazard - I try on so many things at once, that I get so frustrated that I can't even think of putting all those awful clothes back - this is my one weakness. I just CBF with it. MD is different, he is quite neat on his side - this is because he's one of those people that wear the same thing every day so he doesn't have to think about it - he's a cartoon character. It's all the same outfit. I cannot fault him on that - he has ONE win...MD 1 KG's a draw. However, the laundry - which is what this is about - is different - it's all on me. MD like's to do ALL his washing on a Sunday, which is fine, BUT he leaves it EVERYWHERE!!! Absolutely everywhere, which I cannot stand. I have left laundry baskets, and certain pile slots in places, but that's no use. He want's to leave it hanging over every hook and line he can every corner and crevice. Again, living together is not a goddamn fairy tale.

Personal hygiene is the final thing I will mention in this post (If I kept going on we'd be here for days.) It's such hard word have a 5 minute shower a day - she says sarcastically. The showering thing I do EVERYDAY it's not hard, I plan the days I need to wash my hair, shave every part of my body etc. MD doesn't - he can go 72 hours without a shower or wash of any kind, it smells, and not a nice endearing smell - a gross OMG WHAT THE HELL smell... I have tried giving him subtle reminders. I have tried cleaning his bathroom to make it more inviting, I was greeted with skid marks on the toilet - which wouldn't come off with COMMERCIAL STRENGTH cleaning fluid... I told him to reevaluate his diet. There is no use - I have nothing else I can do, he's not a bather...I need to either get him hypnotized or learn to live with it.

Living together is FUCKING HARD. Don't let anyone tell you any differently, it's fucking hard and it will always be that way. Men are fucking babies. Nothing less than that. However, they have their shining moment... When I figure out what MD's are - I will let you know.

Tell me all your horror stories below in the comment section OR instagram me/twitter me. I love to chat..

Till next time - LOVE KGXXX
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